Valentines Day, Shmalentines Day.

So today is Valentine’s Day!

The day where all loved up couples are supposed to make an extra effort to show love to their partners.  Where those looking for love, patiently wait to see if St Valentine/Cupid brings it to them.  And, where those separated in some way from someone special, spend the day having red hearts and commercialised tat thrown in their disheartened little faces.

I myself, (well myself and my Husband), get each other a card.  Some years he has come home with something extra, but I never expect anything, and I never “want” anything.

We get cards for my sake really.  I’d hate to have something happen and wish we’d taken part in the card thing, so I’d have something extra to remember our relationship by.

Mostly, I believe it’s mainly a day for shops to charge a fortune for flowers that cost half the price the day before, and couples everywhere to end up with tat they’ll never want to get rid of, but won’t want in their house after the day is done.

People who know me, and my Husband, will know we’re not the shy and retiring type of couple that hide our feelings and love for each other.  Many times at occasions we’ve been to, the stiff (not in that way), and shy couples are clear to see.  A quick murmur between them, if any conversation has to be had, is plenty enough for them.  Myself and my Husband on the other hand, we’ll chat,  hold hands, cuddle, kiss, dance (if there’s music obviously-were not crazies), and generally flaunt our love, much to the disgust of fellow family or friends.

So why, on the most loved up of days, do we not join in with the overpriced festivities?

One small reason that sticks out for me, is having my heart broken on Valentine’s Day.  Yes, I got dumped on Valentines Day, the same year my Husband and I started dating.

Now I know what you’re thinking, that was so long ago, you’re now married with children, and you’re in love with a decent man, that would never be so vile as to dump you on Valentine’s Day .  I do know this, but things stick, and I can never shake that feeling that someone disliked me enough to dump me on a day you’re supposed to be extra loved up!

The major reason I dislike Valentine’s Day however, has stemmed from losing family members as the years have gone on.

My Great-Grandmother, lost her Husband when I was a child, and, at the time, I was too young to realise what that must’ve felt like for her.

A few years later when my Nan lost her Husband, and I was older, so more aware, I realised just how heartbreaking losing your soulmate must be.

For years these two women, who had married their soulmates and lived decades happily in love, were alone.  They had family of course, but what are family members worth when you don’t have your sidekick, your one true love,  by your side anymore.

And, what an absolute kick in the teeth when Valentines Day, in all its tacky goriness, comes along to throw love in your face.  To show you happy couples, skipping down the street hand in hand, when you go back to a cold empty bed, and memories of what those days used to be like for you.

I am eternally grateful that fate, karma, luck, whatever you want to call it, brought my Husband to me.  And I will continue to show him that I’m grateful, not more on one specific day of the year, but every day for as long as we have together.

So here’s to those couples, loving each other and showing the world how in love they are every day.  Here’s to the singletons who stick a finger up to Valentine’s Day and all it’s tacky goriness.

And here’s to those who had their soulmate, who lost their soulmate, and who would give anything to celebrate any day with their soulmate again.

valentines
My soulmate and I

 

2 thoughts on “Valentines Day, Shmalentines Day.

  1. I’m all for people celebrating Valentines Day I like reading the romantic stories etc it makes me smile, but we are the same as you Jem by way of ‘celebrating’ – we don’t make any extra effort than we usually would because we are very forward with our lovey dovey stuff every other day of the year. Big up to the PDA old married couples! Haha x

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