How easy is it to achieve every ambition you plan for. 

Outside influence, other people’s involvement, major life changes-some out of your own control. Surely these things make it harder for you to achieve goals you’ve set yourself. 

Personally I think I set myself a lot of goals, each day without even realising it! Not massive things, but things you do every day-housework, keeping the kids fed and watered etc, all these things are achievable goals. 

The bigger goals/ambitions in life, however, are a lot harder to achieve.  

I want to be a good mum.

My mum is pretty awful (I’ve written a previous blog about her, feel free to give that a read too here). So I know by my own opinion what makes a bad mum!

I have absolutely no idea what constitutes a “good mum”. Some days I think being a good mum is just getting to the end of the day without having a breakdown, or locking one of the children in the downstairs toilet (this is a joke-I wouldn’t do that-it’s more likely to be me locking myself in.) 

I have ambitions for my children.

I want them to be well behaved and good mannered, helpful and caring. So on the days where I’m tearing my hair out because they’re tag-teaming each other to push my buttons, have I failed in my ambition?

I want to be a good friend. 

I try to do so, but what if one of my friends thinks I haven’t been there for them, called them, text them enough? Does this mean I’ve failed because of their opinion?

I want to make my family proud.  

Does the fact I don’t have a job because I choose to stay at home with my children, and have no qualifications (yet) mean they’re not proud of me for that part of my life? 

I would LOVE to be a great blogger. 

People tell me I’ve got a talent for writing, that this is what I should do in life. I have people view my blog as soon as it comes on, but don’t ‘like’ it. Or I have people not ‘like’ it but follow my blog, and I don’t have as many subscribers as I’d like. So does this mean I’m not a good blogger?
My point is, it doesn’t seem to matter how much you put in, how close you get to achieving your goals or making your ambitions a reality, there’s always going to be some sort of outside involvement that puts you a few steps back. Whether it’s your kids playing up one day making you doubt your parenting abilities, your family being proud of part of your life but wishing for more for you in another,  friends not being on the same page as you, and mainly-and the one I struggle with the most-your own mind telling you you’re not good enough. 

For those reading that know me? I am trying. I really am. 

Sometimes we really are our own worst enemies

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