Today my girl turns 4!
Recently, I realised, I’ve never written about Olivia’s birth. I’ve mentioned it in previous blogs-of course I have. Many of my readers are well aware she was our rainbow baby after our three miscarriages.
But I think it’s important for her to have her own story-her own words-to look back on when I’m old and grey (and probably more forgetful than I am now).
So here you are SWEET-PEA-this is your story. And it all begins 4 years ago today……
You were 9 days overdue-your due date was the 18th of September, and I was booked in for an induction, for the 29th. Your Grandad (my Dad), told me not to fret, and that you’d come before then-and he was right.
I’d begun the evening starving-nothing abnormal there for me during the 9th and final month of my pregnancy with you. I ate dinner with your Daddy, and then told him I was going to go and have a bounce on my pregnancy ball, and took some chocolate gateau with me.
Daddy was thrilled with this plan-he’d just bought the new Fifa for his Xbox, and had waited all day to play it-he’d expected to have been on paternity leave by this point, so was obviously missing out on the hours he assumed he’d have already got to play.
I ate the cake, I bounced, then I really quickly began feeling super sick and tired. Assuming it was the cake and bouncing combination, I headed to bed, kicking myself for not thinking those two things through.
I read some bits and pieces on my phone, turned it off, rolled over to go to sleep and…..pop! I peed myself. I hadn’t-that’s just what I thought I’d done. I pulled back the covers, to be met with a large amount of green water.
I knew straight away-my waters had gone, and you’d pooed before you were coming out!
At this point, I would’ve assumed I’d panic-but I didn’t. I wrapped a towel, big baby nappy style around me, and waddled to the front room. I told your Daddy what had happened-the baby was coming-he needed to call Nanny and get her to come and get your big Brother, and we needed to go to the hospital now. I knew what happened when waters went-and I wasn’t having you at home or in the car!
I went to the toilet, to try and relieve some of the pressure the waters constantly leaking was causing, and to calm myself to remember what I needed to take and do next. I left the bathroom to get your Daddy to get your Brother ready, and he was still stood outside the door-phone in hand, staring blankly at me.
“Did you call your Mum?”
“No, not yet-I wasn’t completely sure what you wanted me to do or say”.
I snatched the phone off of him-in disbelief that I was the one who was calm and level headed-especially as the dull braxton hicks contractions I’d had for weeks, had now upped their game, the and were giving me a run for my money.
I called your Nanny, and told her the situation. Within ten minutes she and your Grandad were with us, your Brother was up, and after another five minutes we were all off!
The contractions were getting stronger throughout the journey, and I had this feeling you were going to come out right there! Thankfully you held on, as did my nerve-and when we arrived at the hospital, I made your Daddy put a ticket on the car-not willing to risk a parking ticket!
We walked into the labour ward, slowly, as I had to keep stopping to clamp my legs together to stop the water trailing behind me (seriously-how much of that stuff is in there!?)
Once shown into our room, I had to show the midwife the colour of my water, which was met by confirmation of meconium (poo) in my water. All plans of a water birth went out of the window, as I was hooked up to a monitor and banished to a bed.
Something that didn’t go out of the window however, was the plan to hypnobirth. This is something I’d been studying for months-practising my breathing, the positive thoughts I needed to get me through, and the music I wanted to play to calm me. Determined to still continue with this plan, I refused drugs for the pain for a long time.
Your labour progressed fast, between my waters breaking and me being 8cm dilated, it was only 4 hours. I asked for gas & air at this point-mainly just for the pressure pain you were causing me-but continued to listen to my body, and keep my breathing calm and regulated.
I asked if I could push shortly after, but the midwife (who happened to be your Brother’s community midwife), asked me to hold on for half an hour-something that was met by “oh god” by Daddy and your Nanny, who had arrived back at the hospital after settling your Brother at her house, and leaving him with Grandad. I nodded, and settled back to breathe through my half an hour.
45 minutes later, I woke up-yes, I’d fallen asleep! My breathing techniques really helped me relax and calm down, and I’d just completely zoned out.
I asked the midwife if it was time, and she agreed, it was time to push you out!
At 10 to 10, on the 27th of September 2013, you arrived into our world-kicking spluttering, crying, and covered in poo!
After I’d recovered a little, we were allowed to clean you up-only with cotton wool and warm water, but you were filthy-and not in a nice new baby kind of way.
We dressed you in a little pink outfit, and took pictures of your chubby little face-the photo we then used to announce your arrival into the world.
We named you Olivia-May-Olivia was a name I’d loved my whole life (and Daddy chose your Brother’s name-so I was allowed yours). Your first name is actually Olivia-May, May after the greatest woman I’ve ever known, your Nanna.
Barbara is your other Nanna in the sky-and one of your Daddy’s greatest loves. We talk to you both, about them often.
I felt amazing-shattered-but amazing. I hadn’t believed I’d ever hold you until I did, and you were everything I needed and more.
Today, as you turn 4 years old, and I remember every single detail about your arrival, I realise how much has changed-I realise you’re not even a little bit little anymore! I don’t feel sad-I thought I would, especially knowing we’re not having any more babies-but I love watching you grow. You have the best personality-even when you’re a tantruming, bawling mess.
You make me laugh on a daily basis-and you really are our rainbow.
Mummy, Daddy, and your big Brother Kye, love you so very much-and we couldn’t imagine our lives without you in it!
Happy Birthday Princess